mr. mom

you'd think that i would be posting every other day, seeing as how i've been home for almost two weeks straight now. but somehow that little turtle just takes up all my time. i've never experienced anything quite like this anticipatory boredom, or maybe it's bored anticipation, that is being a stay-at-home parent. even when he sleeps i have an ear constantly straining. it's hard to do anything but just relax and watch tv (yes, even daytime tv) while he's sleeping, as i'm so worn out from entertaining him. that's the real challenge. it's easy to feed, change, and clothe him. it's keeping him entertained and stimulated that becomes the burden. it's hard having a completely one-sided conversation for an entire day. well, maybe not completely one-sided, as he does return my words and expressions with smiles and squeaks. and it's very rewarding, don't get me wrong. it's just tiring and a little lonely.

and now school has started again. it snuck up on me somehow, as i thought we had two weeks off. how foolish of me. so now i have to start my internship, which is working on a research/book project with one of my professors, and write a 30 page paper for my capstone requirement. another wonderful peculiarity of st. edward's, of which i'm sure i'll be glad of eventually, is that everyone must write an in-depth research/position paper on a current social problem. no sweat if i didn't find it difficult just to dress and shower each day, but quite the challenge when i've got a cute little turtle to keep occupied.

so, i'll quit complaining now. thank you internet audience for being there to listen to my gripes. please don't get the idea that i am unhappy. fletcher is amazing and cute and so different everyday that i'm usually overwhelmed with wonder and affection. but it's the unique ability of a parent to feel those things over a backdrop of exhaustion and frustration, i guess. if prayer is your thing than please offer up some for sara and me, for avoidance of depression and frustration and for energy and enthusiasm to be readily available.

***

the above was written last week. a little bleak, i know. i was having a bad day. i'm leaving it in because i think it's an accurate description of how it feels some days. other days, things are much better.

like yesterday. yesterday was fletcher's two-month birthday. we celebrated again with john, gio, and giada. we went to their house and ate pizza and watched game 7 of the mavs/spurs. it was fun. giada is a darling.

so, fletcher had his first round of shots today. i couldn't go because i had class, but sara said he did pretty well. he's asleep now and i'm nervously waiting for him to wake up and start screaming. but tylenol and lovin' will hopefully ease his discomfort.

he's actually been quite a peach lately. content and at ease expect when hungry. and who isn't an ornery bastard when hungry? i know i am. he also dislikes tom cruise. or at least MI-3, because he would not sit through it. he liked V for Vendetta alright, though. so i don't know what to do about X-Men 3 next week. do i risk it?

laughing is still just out of reach, but he's getting closer. he's starting to vocalize a little bit, although it usually just sounds like a squeak or a modified sob. it must be hard to manipulate those delicate vocal chords. especially for someone who can't even control their fingers or hold their own head steady. although he's getting close in that regard too.

here are his two-month stats:

length (height when i hold him upright): 23 in
weight: 12 lb 8 oz
head: 40 cm

i was hoping he would be in the upper percentiles, like freakishly tall for his age or something, but he's average so far. except in weight. apparently he's in the 75th in weight.

***

i've been trying to post the above for about a week now. i can't get the pictures to upload, for some reason. so i'm going to go ahead and post this and try to do the pictures separately.